I feel a bit hypocritical for writing about being happy that I am living alone when I am at my parents’ house, in my bedroom, waiting for my mom to shout, “Lunch is ready!”. In a few minutes, I will have a home-cooked meal. Yep, I am at home for the weekend.
The late start of living alone
I have been living alone for a little over two years now, though I might still be considered a newbie on this moving out from your parents’ thing, especially by the Western standard.
I have sat through too many episodes of One Tree Hills and 90210 to know that I packed and stepped out much later compared to many of you. In the TV show, they move out when they attend university, which is what? At 18 years old.
I, on the other hand, in my early 20s was still living under my parents’ roof with no plan to move out. But I did and even though I only have lived alone for a short time compared to many of you, I am planning to share my living space with someone only after I travel all around the world or and become a president. So, at some point, I might out live-alone and for that, let me share with you my two cents of living alone.
The joy of living alone
Moving out across the country was one of my biggest life decisions and one of the best ones. It turns out that I love living alone.
Living alone, for the first time, meant I got to go back whenever I want, eat whatever I want and bring home whenever I want.
I love making my own decisions by myself.
I was never a house rule follower anyway.
I have missed laundry for a month; gone out at 2 AM to rent a DVD because I couldn’t sleep; turned the night in at 6 PM and gone swimming at 6 AM, without anyone questioning me. I was my own boss!
The un-joy of living alone
But then, I felt sick, got my heart broken by Sas, failed on my test, and burned my clothes too many times. I felt lonely, I got threatened, and I went broke. Oh, so broke that I have to move to a friend’s house to get back on my feet and saved enough rent money.
The lessons of living alone
Getting time to be alone, choosing to live alone, and to be able to live in any way I want also meant that I have to make good decisions, a lot of good decisions.
I have to plan my weekly meal, buy groceries, pay for health insurance, and save for rainy days.
Living alone means I still have to be in bed at a certain time so that I wouldn’t be a bitch to people at work the next morning.
I am responsible for my well being like taking vitamins, and floss regularly (yes, I had to reteach myself basic hygiene).
Living alone also is a minimalist movement. At least moving 5 times in the past 2 years has taught me so. I try to fit all my life belongings into two big suitcases and a backpack.
Living alone is not all rosy, but I did learn to respect myself and to enjoy my own company.
I no longer feel down or angry for any good reason like how I was in my teenage years.
I know enough to walk out when someone seems like bad news without trying to see beyond their flaws.
I learn to feed myself.
If asked what makes me happy, I can give you a number of things without catching a breath; egg tart, writing, planning a trip, cat, and glittery stuff.
More about living alone.
I am supposed to tell you that living alone made me self-actualized and a grown-up. Well, in some ways it does, like buying an extra lock for the house and taking travel insurance, but I still brought my power work suit home, so my mommy can help to stitch the loose hem.
Living alone forces you to build your tribe from scratch. Your first-person might no longer be your family. This is true for me because I live so far from them. I made friends, and they become my best friends in case of an emergency.
Recently I had a chance to share an apartment with two of my best friends. Ala F.R.I.E.N.D.S. But I passed it. I love them. I love hanging out with them, but I also really like living alone. I like hanging out with myself. Hey, maybe it’s still kinda like F.R.I.E.N.D.S. And I am Ross instead of Monica.
My point is to try it. Try living alone!
You will find a part of yourself, your awesome self that you didn’t know existed. Like the ability to eat a burned meal or the courage to spend a weekend out of the town by yourself. This part could be a great asset. It is good. It is fun. You will also meet part that you are not so proud of, like eating cereal for breakfast, lunch, and dinner for the entire weekend. That part? Embrace it.
Okay, I got to wrap up now. My mom has been shouting lunch four times and the last one she shouted my full name.